Swimming the Matrix


My Attempt at 30 Days of Social

I don’t consider myself a social person. I don’t have a lot of friends, I certainly don’t go out to the bars, and I’m not a part of any group online like a forum or a guild in World of Warcraft (though I do read a lot of Reddit). I don’t have a large Twitter following, I don’t post to Tumblr, and I don’t share pictures on Instagram. If I am in a social situation, I’m worn out by it rather than energized.

That being said, there’s something to be said for why I don’t do any of that, and it’s a complex reason. The primary reason, I feel like, is that I don’t have time. Of course, when you’re doing a startup, trying to make sure you still can pay rent at the end of the month, it’s easy to cut down on the Facebook posts. But to be honest, I have time. I take at least an hour a day to just sit and watch a TV show, if for no other reason than to unwind and try to get my energy levels to go down enough so I can go to sleep.

No, the deeper reason why I don’t post all of that stuff is simple: I don’t think what I have to say is especially interesting. I’ve spent my whole life being misunderstood. Whether it’s the family that insists I know how to fix their DVR because I “do computers” or the acquaintances who think what I do is comparable to work done by oversees programmers, people have always had a hard time “getting” me. And that makes it hard to explain, why being an entrepreneur attracts me, why I can’t come to dinner until I fix this bug in my code, or why I’m hopping mad when I’m working in WordPress, because most people don’t understand my lifestyle and my profession.

I’ve realized, this past year, as I’ve changed jobs several times, that I find myself feeling disconnected from society at large. Sure, I have my few friends and my business partners, but I don’t network like I should, I certainly fail at keeping in touch, and I’ve been so insular, it’s no wonder people ask me what I’ve been doing, and are surprised when they see what all I do.

Because I don’t share. I’ve never shared, because I was told my whole life that what I had to say didn’t matter. Funny enough, everyone who told me that was dead wrong.

So I’ve decided, on my 26th birthday, and for the next 30 days, I will do the following every day:

  • Post one article on my blog, either personal or professional
  • Post something (aside from my blog notification) to Facebook
  • Post something (aside from my blog notification) to Twitter
  • Respond to posts on Facebook and Twitter

My more social contacts have told me it won’t change anything, that you have to be social for months to build up a following. I think they misinterpreted my desire to be social. I’m not looking for Internet fame. I guess I just want to get over my fear of sharing. And as I overcame my anxiety disorder, my ignorance of everything not done on a computer, and my depression, I will overcome this as well.

Published by meatshield, on July 14th, 2014 at 2:11 pm. Filled under: UncategorizedNo Comments

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